This was my entry for the Cartoonists' Club of Great Britain Caption Competition from a couple of weeks ago. I've reverted to scanning in preparatory pencils and using a much tighter line and, as a consequence, I am much happier with the result. It isn't perfect, but I am not about to point out any failings that are in the drawing. To my mind there are far more positives than there are negatives. The biggest positive, of course, is that I find it grotesquely amusing. So, what were the thought processes that lead to this - this - travesty? The caption was set by Steve Bright (this is me name-dropping) who opted for the wild card form of caption. Don't [blank] it... Now then, I don't know how many verbs there are in the English language, quite a few dozen I should think, but we are adding to the list daily by also employing nouns as verbs (to hoover, to text. What's wrong with vacuuming or sending a text message? Our cooker was built by Hoover, does this mean I hoover our grub every time I cook? No, it bloody well doesn't! --- end of rant). So, which verb to use from a choice of so many? In times of crisis my mind goes into default mode and I naturally thought of Frankenstein's monster being goaded by Igor (I know, it is rather worrying, isn't it?). What could Igor use with which to tease the monster? Tease, hmm, tease. Striptease? Yes, striptease could work. Except, Igor disrobing in front of the monster could be open to all manner of unintended misinterpretation of a homo-erotic nature. But, I still liked the idea of a striptease. Hmmm. Some time ago I attended two Burlesque shows; one at the Edinburgh Festival and the other at a place called the Wet Spot, in Leeds. I have to say both were far more entertaining and inventive than I expected, but thinking along burlesque lines of thought, I came up with the idea of an old-fashioned fan dance. It still goes on today, research revealed. There are specialist manufacturers of fans for fan dancing! Talk about niche markets! How do they make a profit? How many ostriches are there in the world?
Enny whey. I suppose there are still echoes of homo-eroticism in Igor's dance, but hardly exciting and hopefully amusing.